Episode 35 | Co-Hosts: Joe Rouse & Trev Warnke

🔥 Why This Episode Matters

A lot of entrepreneurs won’t say it out loud, but anxiety is running the show more than they’d like to admit.

It shows up as distraction, procrastination, short tempers, and lack of focus. It leaks into business decisions and follows you home, affecting how you show up as a husband, father, and leader.

The problem isn’t that you don’t care or aren’t capable. It’s that you’re trying to carry too much without clarity, structure, or accountability.

This episode matters because it calls it out directly—and gives you a path back to control.

🎧 Listen to the Episode

👤 Meet the Host & Guest

• Joe Rouse — Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn | Profile

  Joe Rouse is a Brotherhood Beyond Business leader and host known for direct, practical conversations around entrepreneurship, accountability, and personal responsibility. As owner of Breakaway Fitness & Performance, Joe challenges men to build strong companies without sacrificing faith, family, and integrity.

• Trev Warnke — Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn | Profile

  Trev Warnke is an entrepreneur, coach, and co-founder of Brotherhood Beyond Business. Through the Brotherhood community, Trev works with male entrepreneurs who want to build strong businesses without sacrificing their health, faith, or family.

📌 What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• Why anxiety is often tied to lack of clarity and control

• How avoidance fuels stress more than action

• The connection between discipline and mental stability

• How business pressure impacts your home life

• Why accountability reduces overwhelm and improves focus

• Practical ways to regain control of your day

• How to identify what you’re avoiding and confront it directly

🧩 Episode Summary

Joe Rouse and Trev Warnke open this conversation by addressing something most entrepreneurs experience but rarely break down—anxiety. Not as a vague feeling, but as a pattern tied directly to how you’re operating in your business and life.

They explain how anxiety often builds when you’re unclear on priorities or avoiding key actions. Instead of addressing the root, many entrepreneurs stay busy, stack more tasks, or distract themselves. That creates more pressure, not less.

The conversation shifts into discipline and ownership. When you take control of what needs to be done and execute consistently, anxiety starts to drop. Not because life gets easier, but because you’re no longer avoiding the things creating the pressure.

They also tie this into leadership at home. When stress from business isn’t managed, it shows up in your relationships. The solution isn’t more time—it’s better control, clearer priorities, and stronger accountability.

🕒 Episode Timestamps

[00:00] Intro & topic overview
[05:10] What anxiety actually is for entrepreneurs
[13:40] Lack of clarity and control
[22:30] Avoidance vs execution
[33:15] Impact on leadership and family
[44:20] The role of accountability
[55:00] Practical steps to regain control

💡 Quote Highlight

“Most anxiety comes from avoiding what you already know you need to do.”

🚀 Next Steps

👉 Download our Your Circle is Your Ceiling eBook

👉 Learn more about Our Method

📚 Resources & Links

• Follow BBB on: Website | Instagram | YouTube | X | Facebook | Buzzsprout Podcasts

• Watch the full episode on YouTube

• Want to listen to this episode: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | Buzzsprout

🚀Full Transcript

Trev (01:01)

Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of Brotherhood Beyond Business where me and Joe today are going to talk about anxiety in business, but also in life. We're just going to go through the anxious part of life, which any, would say this relates to every single person in the world. Anyway, that says they don't have anxiety really either one isn't old enough to realize what anxiety is or two just, it kind of pushes it off, but we all have anxiety. And today we're going to dive into those different components. And again,

Joe Rouse (01:02)

Thank

and the other is the other. So, I think that's a great way to it. I that's a do it.

Trev (01:25)

Each of us at different times of our life have different anxieties in different ways and all of us handle things differently. Some people money is anxious for them. Some other people just doesn't bother them all. Some people get anxious about the growth of their business. Other people just like, I'm just happy with having a business. So there's different ways that people deal with things. And just because we struggle with anxiety in one way, doesn't mean that's a way that you might struggle with anxiety, but you might have it in a different way. Example is my wife, she's always struggled with anxiety. She's a teacher. Her anxiety is just like, the kids behaved.

Joe Rouse (01:35)

Okay.

Trev (01:54)

Like that's an

anxiety I don't have at all, you know? So it's just like we have different things that we're anxious about every day and it's just how do you deal with those? And we're going to talk about one, the anxieties we might have in everyday life, but also how we deal with those things and keep moving forward. Joe, kind of bounce off some of the ideas that you have on that.

Joe Rouse (02:09)

Man, so I had to look up, I wanted to look up the exact definition of anxiety and I love this. This is from Google. It says, the body's natural future oriented response to stress manifesting as feelings of fear, dread and apprehension. And while it can serve as a helpful short-term motivator for challenging situations, it becomes an anxiety disorder when symptoms are excessive, persistent and interfere with daily life causing physical sensations like racing heart, sweatiness and tension. So as business owners,

Trev (02:14)

you you

Joe Rouse (02:36)

I would say the most consistent thing in our life is going to be some sort of future oriented

response to stress. And I don't know that people understand that because they see like, not, I didn't do this, but they might see Joe got a new car. Business must be great. You know, they're hiring a new staff member. Business must be great. Like a lot of things have to fall into place perfectly for us as entrepreneurs to ever feel like business is going great. And I would argue that

What I've learned over 12 years, now almost 13 years as a business owner is that it's never like this, right? It's always this. It's just highs and lows, highs and lows, and learning to stay as straight or as level as possible during those highs and lows. And you and I have both learned some great lessons as far as like having multiple locations, having two sets of staffs, two managers, closing a location and dealing with all the...

the anger from the members that comes from that at you if you close a second location, and the worry about future stressful situations or anxiety. sometimes I think if you're not careful, if you don't have the right thing to call on to help you with dealing with future stressors, it can really wrap you up and weigh on you.

And it can lead to other unhealthy habits like excessive drinking, drugs, all that stuff. But when you learn that it's literally a part of life, and I'm not saying everybody can do this, I'm not a psychologist, I don't know, but the best thing, the most helpful thing for me that I've learned is that it's a literal part of life. There's always going to be future stressors that I have or could choose to think about. What I have control over is how I deal with

my life or how I deal with those future stressors whenever I'm actually thinking about it, whenever I'm having anxiety issues. You always got that feeling right there in the middle of your chest that you just can't shake.

For me, as a man, all I wanna do is internalize it. Like I'll go stare at a fire and just think about things. But I also know that what we're called to do as Christian men is to give it to the Lord, like literally, physically, and to take on His yoke because His is easier to handle. And not to mention,

we need to focus on right now. It doesn't mean we can't plan for the future, but we have to worry about today because today has enough to worry about. And if we don't physically give it to Jesus, give it to God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit to take that on, then it's always gonna be sitting right here. And that's where the devil will creep in, feelings of doubt, feelings of...

imposter syndrome, things like that will start to come in regularly all the time. And the only way that I know and that I've found that helps me to actually give it to God because he's unseen, I can't say I've seen him and like, hey, here you go, right, is to you pray without ceasing. So always praying. And I'm not saying I do that all the time, not trying to claim any kind of high hat or anything, but

That's the only thing that helps me is doing what God tells me to do and staying in His word and praying without ceasing. And when I'm going through really tough times, as far as anxiety goes, like worrying about future stressors, I hate to say I have anxiety, because I don't think it, I don't identify as like somebody with anxiety. Like it's just something you have, it's a part of life, thinking about future stressors. But that's the way that I physically give it to God. Just to go right into it is I have to pray without.

ceasing, which keeps me connected to God. And that's one thing that helps me really get through it.

Trev (06:22)

Yeah, I, I mean, I've never, until I met my wife, did I ever associate anxiety with anything I was going through and she deals with.

So when you were describing the, anxiety, like what it is, she, she's more chronic anxiety. Like it's like, she's on medication for that kind of level. I've never been to that level, but it really hit me that, Hey, I do have daily anxiety, but it's not something that like stops me from doing anything stops me in my track. It's just one those things where I was like, man, I'm, not really aware that I actually am going through these things. and so in my history, I have a history of binge eating and the binge eating is

Joe Rouse (06:50)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (06:56)

really replacing anxiety is what it is. When I would get too anxious on these things, I would use that as a coping mechanism. And I've luckily have really come overcome my binge eating over the last year. There's multiple things I've helped with that using a GLP one has helped a lot because it's decreased hunger. But the other thing probably, I'd probably say four or five months ago, exactly what you're talking about. saw a video from a guy, um, on you, I don't know if it's YouTube or it was, but he had said, um, give your, give your burdens to the Lord, right?

And he's like, the problem is most people, when they say that they pray, they give it, they say they're giving it to the Lord, but then they kind of hold on to it still, right? They're just, they kind of keep on, but I'm only going to give you like 80 % of this or even 50 % of this. And they don't really let it go. And I remember hearing that and being like, man, that's so true. And in the moment I wasn't praying consistently to the Lord. Um, and so, you know, so that, in that moment I started to be like, Hey, whenever I'm truly feeling what I would consider anxious moments, I need to just stop in that moment, pray.

Joe Rouse (07:36)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (07:53)

ask God to take that burden from me in the moment. And then from there, figure out what to do after that. so my process and that has instantly, just takes that edge off that instant edge off. Yeah, exactly. Wait, yeah. But takes that off. Yeah. And it's so, so much that that instantly in the second part of it is then I'm able to take that weight off where now I can think through what am I really anxious about? Right. And so like the other day we had a client put their account on pause and it's a pretty decent size.

Joe Rouse (08:02)

The weight. The weight, right? His yoke is light.

Trev (08:20)

client. And so they put their account on pause for a couple of months. And I was like, okay, well, that caused some anxious moment in the second, in that moment, like, man, that's not, I've got to figure out, like, do we grow? What do we do? We're trying to grow the brotherhood. So I don't want to have to put a lot more marketing into level up. So just kind of going through this process. And I gave that to the Lord. And then from there, I just wrote down notes about, what are the things that I'm really anxious about? am I anxious about the fact that I need to get another client? Where are we at financially? So I just kind of went through, okay, here's some of the things that could take, can relieve that anxiousness. And within like,

30 minutes, all of that, like I haven't even thought about it since that moment. Right. It's just like, okay, now that's gone and I can move on to the next thing, but they started with the prayer and it started like giving God that burden. Like, Hey, take this burden from me. And then from there gave me the reduced the weight enough for me to write down and think through it clearly instead of like, know, usually what we do as entrepreneurs is when that moment happens, then we break everything in front of us, trying to fix that instant solution instead of being like, maybe I actually have stuff that can handle this.

Joe Rouse (09:12)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (09:15)

Maybe it's not that big a deal. And for me, all it was is like, had some sales opportunities coming up over the next couple of weeks and being like, okay, like I need to just convert on those sales opportunities. So I already have money in the pipeline, ability in the pipeline to replace that. And then two, we're working on the brotherhood right now. And when the brotherhood gets to certain point, it's going to be a great, you know, model for us to grow overall. So it's like, I don't want to divert my attention from the real goal just because this one little thing came in the way. And it just created an anxious moment. And I think for like you were talking about, for most of us entrepreneurs,

It's really an anxious moment than true anxiety that we deal with all the time where it's like, man, I'm always just, can never stop thinking. It's more like these anxious moments pops up and we need to find ways to be able to like handle that anxiety in the moment.

Joe Rouse (09:55)

We want to solve it immediately. mean, this whole conversation, us hopping on this podcast this morning is a godsend for me because like we were discussing it, how I was frustrated with some things as I'm talking about just some things with Breakaway. And I had one thought this morning to, because I didn't have to get up super early, I had one thought this morning to start my day by

by grabbing my Bible, which sits like right here beside me. My dad gave me this when I was really young. But I didn't because I wanted to get to work because I wasn't physically at the facility because of the weather, because of the snow. And I wanted to get to work because I was frustrated, I was anxious about some numbers that I'm not happy with. So I immediately think I have to solve this problem.

and use my brain to solve this problem, to protect and provide. So immediately I'm like, well, let me schedule a call to my GM. We need to go through lost clients. Let me see when the last time was I reached out to these leads. Let me see how my ads are doing, see if I need to tweak those. me see, just going through the checklist of all that stuff, which is, can be helpful, but it doesn't lower the anxiety that you're dealing with. The future stressor is still there. And I literally,

God told me to read the start with the Bible today. Get in my word. When you're in his word constantly, you'll know your will, his will for your life. You can't know it if you're not in his word. And I decided not to. So this conversation, even we're talking about this, putting this out there to the world, right? Hoping somebody listens to it. Just having this conversation reminding me to reprioritize, to pray without ceasing is gonna be very helpful for me with anxious type feelings just today, immediately.

Like right now in this second.

Trev (11:43)

Well, the interesting thing about anxious moments is it throws you out of your routine. And so there's three things in my life that are built in as I call anxiety busters, but they're not meant to be truly. But when I think about them, these are things that help me reduce my anxiety without even realizing it. But the first one is pray in the morning while I'm in my infrared sauna. Like I usually do my prayer in that every morning I do that.

Two is I do a midday lift and then three I do evening walk. But when I'm feeling anxious, the amount of times I skip those things is quite often. I have these built in things but I skip them when I'm feeling anxious because I want to outwork this problem when realistically it's not outworking this problem. It's actually, okay, you have these things built in place. You just need to reduce that and then you can fix.

As entrepreneurs, our best skillset is we are great at fixing problems. That's probably the thing where we're the best at fixing the problem. And so it's like, we just need to put ourselves in environments where we can work through the problem. So start off making sure we pray to is getting the other things in that get, let our mind be free from business and these things. So we can just kind of relax a little bit and okay, now we're going to solve this problem, but it is interesting when we get anxious. When I get anxious, I skipped the things that probably help. And even another thing for me in the past was eating bad. I would eat bad when I felt anxious.

And that instantly drops my energy and drops my drops, like how I feel. So all those, we confound that issue. And it's one of those things where it's like, we actually probably have these things in place, but we let it go because that. But I do think the biggest change for me was like, whenever that moment happens, as soon as I get into prayer, I, now it's like almost instantly when I treat that go right into prayer.

Joe Rouse (12:59)

Mm-hmm.

Good night.

Trev (13:20)

And then it's like, okay, now I can get back onto like my life again, like back onto my routine. It doesn't mean I'm going to ignore what just happened. I do probably have something maybe I need to fix about this. Sometimes I don't sometimes it's just like, man, I'm just overthinking something. Um, and then the other times it's like, man, maybe I do need to find a solution. Like when somebody suspends their account, we're going to get them back again, but I need to come up with that $700 we lost. And so it's like, do I recover that $700? Okay. I have things already in place. I've just got to like, not stress in this moment and just keep working the plan. The plan's in place. Just keep working the plan.

Joe Rouse (13:38)

Okay.

Yeah, stick to those foundational things that we talk about. Like keep working, check the boxes of the most important things, get those done and don't let these anxieties and stressors throw us off from what our normal routine is.

Trev (14:00)

Yeah. And I was meeting with my brother had group on Friday and it's not, this isn't probably an anxious moment for one of the members. his name's Kai, but he, he wants to add, they have a space opening up right next to him and they've talked about growth and, getting into a bigger location and the one right next him. we're talking about that kind of stuff and we're going through like, how do you cover that new rent and that kind of stuff and

just talking through that with him by the end of it is like, you know, he actually could cover the rent right now. Like that's just how much the rent's not overly expensive and space, but the pop, the opportunity that he has to be able to explode his business from that point is so great. And his biggest thing is he doesn't do any marketing. His business is built completely on word of mouth. So we could, if we could just uptake his marketing to cover the $1,200 a month rent, well, we could cover, we could fix that like almost instantly just by putting some marketing towards it. But

Joe Rouse (14:30)

Yeah.

Trev (14:53)

just going through that conversation, have that conversation with him. He just at the end of it, he just felt so good because of the comment. these are easy, you know, realistically the thing that I've been like trying to figure out is like we solved in like 30 minutes, you know, because you need somebody to talk through those things with you a little bit too. So sometimes as entrepreneurs, that loneliness is also like you talked about, you and me talking this morning before this call or before this podcast was that an anxiety reducer for us. We were able to have, we weren't feeling lonely at the top. could have those deep conversations with somebody else that allows us, okay, like

talk to somebody else that understands this kind of equation that I'm struggling with.

Joe Rouse (15:27)

Yeah, somebody else who understands who's in a similar, not necessarily the same situation, but just has experienced similar stressors or for similar reasons. They got the same stakes, the same things on the line and they have to work through those things. That would be the next thing I would say. I would almost argue that having you guys in my life and having the brotherhood is a godsend because that gives me another outlet to speak to, right? Like I prioritize.

where I spend time with God first and then we get into tactical things and into practical things when I talk to you guys and other business owners.

Trev (16:03)

Yeah. And it's just having somebody to bounce stuff off of even like somebody that just knows you well enough. just like last week, you had talked about making your own podcast, which I'm super proud that you enjoy that side. But my biggest thing was, Hey, let me just come to you and just say, Hey, here's the things that you need to think about to be able to like, how much time goes into like publishing the podcast and putting out the reels and all that kind of stuff.

Joe Rouse (16:18)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (16:23)

And for you is like, yeah, that's like, maybe I don't have the time for that, but just thinking, thinking through having somebody like question you a little bit, like, okay, that's an awesome idea. However, did you think through these things? And if you thought through all these components and it's still a yes, great, but we just need the ability to bounce these things off of other people because as entrepreneurs, we're naturally going to run towards opportunities. because that's just who we are. I mean, we all do it. I do it like every single day. have to be like, I need to say no.

because I didn't know I can't, you know, do what I need to do for the capacity I need to without negatively impacting another part of my life. but we always need, we need people to be able to like help us. Like the thing that kind of brought this to mind for me was if you go to a marketing company, they're always going to just sell you on something to market more, right? But they don't tell you the opportunity cost that comes along with that, meaning like Facebook ads.

Joe Rouse (17:06)

and

Trev (17:10)

If you go to a face like, man, I have this issue. need to grow more. You go to a Facebook ads company and all of a sudden like, Oh yeah, I just, you add us, you know, we're $1,200 a month or $1,500 a month. Then, you know, $3,000 ad spend is no big deal. You'll recover that really quickly, but now you're sitting there with that burden of, I have to find $4,500 now extra just to market my business. Even for them, it's just like, yeah, we can sell that. We can get you this many leads, but they don't tell you how many sales you're going to get from that. So it's just the idea that like, but when it's you and me, we're going to have an honest conversation. Like Joe, think.

Joe Rouse (17:28)

Just to break even, right?

Trev (17:39)

that could be a good idea for you. You definitely need to grow, but it's like, maybe that's too expensive to like you do Facebook ads work for your industry. Right. And so it's like having somebody that's honest with you, that's going to like give you a little bit like, Hey, in a moment, these sales, all these companies out there are good at selling. And that's what their experts are. They're selling, even if it's not the right product for you, they're still going to sell it to you. And so it's like, well, you need this group of people to help you be able to like,

Joe Rouse (17:48)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (18:03)

take that anxiety away a little bit of like, man, should I be doing this or should I'm falling behind? Cause I'm not spending 40, $4,500 on Facebook ads. Like, Oh no, no, no, no. There's maybe cheaper way to market your business into maybe you're just not like following up your current leads. Do you need more leads or do you have enough leads? So

Joe Rouse (18:16)

Yep. Or

they tell you, hey, you'll make this back up with one client long-term. And it's like, no, that doesn't count.

Trev (18:22)

Yeah, you you sign up for two year

contract. You can pay for this one person a month is like, yeah, but if I don't hit on one person a month, now I'm going negative.

Joe Rouse (18:28)

Nah.

That doesn't affect

your cash. I mean, that doesn't talk about cashflow either.

Trev (18:34)

Exactly. Yep. It's just interesting. The perspective that you get on that one-on-one conversation with somebody in sometimes even business coaches are great for that too, where they can give you honest feedback. Like maybe that's not the best direction to go.

Joe Rouse (18:36)

Which is king.

Yeah, and having somebody in your life that you... I'm trying to think the best way to say this. Sometimes when you pay people to have those conversations, this is going to sound like a plug for us because this is a service that we offer with the Brotherhood. We don't start out charging people, but there's a point where there's aspects of it that have to be paid for.

when you pay for it, you're much more likely to take that advice on. Unless it's a terrible experience and you don't respect the person saying it. But like in your case, like I was talking about, I really enjoy interviewing people. love learning people's stories and listening to them and potentially starting my own podcast just for that purpose. And you gave me some good advice and things to think about. And because I respect you and your, you know, your advice.

and your insight that slowed me down a little bit, right? Just made me wait a second, let me think about this a little bit more. And that can be a very valuable thing to have in your life. Very, very valuable and I'm appreciative for it too. ⁓ And that's a big thing that this serves.

Trev (19:47)

Well, that.

Yeah, I mean, on the brotherhood side of things, it is when people ask me like, why do I have to pay for the brotherhood? Well, one, you're paying for somebody to keep the group tight, keep the right people in the group. And two, you're paying honestly for other people to be, give you transparency because if you just go out.

Joe Rouse (20:02)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (20:08)

You just randomly go out, hang out with three other guys, you know, a little bit, but don't know if that will, maybe they're all entrepreneurs. You guys are going get into conversation, but you're probably, you're going to hold back. Really? You're going to hold back because you're not going to like want to ruin this friendship or whatever this is. Well, when you're in something that's, that's more than that, where it's like, this is an expectation of what we're doing. Like then you're getting people's true transparency, but there's also a side where we're, we're also, guiding the group and coaching them up on how to help each other too. What I mean by that is we believe in the idea of be kind.

not nice, right? So the idea of kind means I'm going to give you honest truth, but I'm not going to be a dick about it. I'm going to be honest and I'm going to give it to you in a way that you need to hear it, Joe, but I'm not just going to tell you what you need to hear. I'm not just going tell you what you want to hear and be like, Oh, that's such a great idea. Go do it. And then six months later, you're like, that was a bad idea. My idea, my goal is to be kind. And we learned this from Nick Berry, be kind, not nice. And so we really focus on that. And that's, you have to coach people up to learn how to like be kind. Cause my natural instinct,

Joe Rouse (20:38)

in.

Trev (21:05)

I think my natural instinct is kind, but sometimes when I especially first started off in masterminds, I could definitely be more on the dick side of things where I'd hit a little bit harder and I didn't really know the people. For you and me, Joe, I can kind tell you anything, but we have such a strong relationship. But I never come at you to be like, I'm trying to be a dick about this. I'm just trying to be like, hey, that's probably not, this is why I'm being completely honest about it. There's no negative side to why I would tell you this. I would just tell you this because you're my friend. And part of the brotherhood component for us is the fact that we

Joe Rouse (21:12)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (21:33)

we need to guide people along that path because sometimes the hardest truths are not easy to hear and you've got to hear it from somebody that really cares about you. you

Joe Rouse (21:41)

Yeah, something I've learned with that, that's helped me because I'm very quick to be like, well, that doesn't make sense. Why would you do that? You have to learn how to speak to people, right? When we're offering advice and

the way that caters to me and has been consistent now that I've researched it is asking, not offering advice, but helping people out of curiosity.

So it really just leads to me asking questions rather than just telling them exactly how to do something all the time. And that's more towards the coaching side, right? Than the managing side. And there's times where you gotta manage people, but in this, it's usually, it's a coaching situation. allowing myself to truly be curious about where they're coming from and why they're doing it allows me to understand it better so that I can coach people in a better way or a more effective way, just asking questions. And it helps me learn.

which is something I enjoy doing about people. And I think curiosity, when you come at something with curiosity, it can disarm people too. They're much less likely to be defensive. Just something as simple as saying, hey, out of curiosity this, and I know that's a very literal example, but it definitely disarms things and helps us understand, are you aware of this potential problem that you might deal with?

to create that awareness in them, help them realize it on their own. That's been a big helper for me when coaching people.

Trev (23:05)

Yeah. it's even like, so it starts conversation with anxiety is like being able to be relatable to the other people that are struggling in the group. When you have like seven or eight other people that are like, let's use anxiety as an example.

you know, you start to have that conversation. Other people can be related. Like, yeah, I definitely know I had this issue. We had our finances, we got hit big from tax season. And man, in that moment, my heart was just pounding. had no idea how to find this money, you know, or somebody else is like, man, we just got like, we just got sued, you know, like I know this company and, where we're at and they got sued once he was telling a story, got sued once nothing their fault, but they got sued. Well, they then had to go file for bankruptcy to cover the lawsuit until the lawsuit got

Joe Rouse (23:23)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (23:42)

proven wrong. And then they're able to like, you know, not have to fight, you know, reduce the power you take back bankruptly. Yeah. And telling that story and him telling that story, just being like, Holy smokes, I've never even thought about how to even like, when you think about bankruptcy, you just think somebody couldn't pay their bills. But realistically, they got a lawsuit against them, somebody that had a false claim against them. Then the lawsuit came back that they that company was wrong.

Joe Rouse (23:46)

What an experience that is.

Trev (24:04)

And then they were able to take their bank. didn't have, but they had to file for bankruptcy. Imagine going through that process and have others to be like, Hey, I've ran into situations you may even thought I've never thought about before. And my anxiety level, when I think about what they had to go through for that and me worrying about a 700 dollar a month client, like, Oh, okay. Well, my life's pretty easy, you know, in certain ways you think about the stuff like that, but it does help having others that have like, man, I've gone through something like that. Or maybe I haven't experienced that, but I know somebody that's experienced that. The relatability between a group of men.

Joe Rouse (24:21)

Yeah.

Trev (24:32)

It just changes your world and your world perspective.

Joe Rouse (24:35)

Especially when you can talk to them about things that are actually a really big deal and they've been through it and they can say, look, I understand how that feels right now. Like I know your heart feels like it's gonna beat out of your chest. Like you're gonna break your ribs any second. But I can promise you there is another side to this that you'll come out on. every, every situation is like that. Every single situation, no matter how serious it feels, no matter how financially heavy it might be.

Because I think we're all going to look at the cost of something financially as like usually what probably brings the most stress.

there's always a couple weeks from now. There's always a month from now where even if the problem isn't solved, you'll be able to think more clearly about it simply because it's a little bit further in the past. And when you're going through something, mean, imagine that, imagine going through getting sued, having to declare bankruptcy to handle it while it's going on. So you're dealing with this every single day bankruptcy.

which comes with its own labels and know, like societal pressures and assumptions, but knowing that there's still another side to it, you're still gonna come out, you can still come out very successful on the other side of it. And talking to somebody who's actually been through that, they're like, no, this is actually common. This happens in these situations and everything's gonna be okay. But I know right now it's horrible and it sucks, because you're dealing with this from every single angle. Yeah, having it's...

Trev (25:37)

Mm-hmm.

Joe Rouse (26:02)

Having that group of people to go through that with is massive. I think it took me years to understand how important that was to be able to talk to people that I trust like you and like Danny and like Mark and not just talk to them to like get it out, but to help them understand that when we're guiding each other to keep each other grounded and level during all of this stuff during business, that it's a real thing. It's real experience that they're sharing. It's not just.

Well, you experienced it this way, but I'm experiencing it different. It's like, no, this is actually what's going to happen. You're going to feel this way for some type of time. And then you're going to have some clarity. ⁓ If you lean on God, if you pray, if you pray without seizing, you might get there a little bit faster. You might not, but you're going to come out okay. You have the support in place. You'll find a way. Everything will be okay. So let's focus on what we can control right now because

Trev (26:39)

you

you

Joe Rouse (26:58)

somebody's been through this. It took me a long time to realize that that was real advice and not just somebody comforting you. You like you grow up as a kid and your mom holds you and they might rub your back or something like that to comfort you in the moment. But as you grow up and you become

Trev (27:12)

you

Joe Rouse (27:12)

a man and you get business advice for going through things that suck, it's not the same thing. It's actual like, dude, seriously, I promise you, this is horrible right now. Like, let's just talk about how horrible it is, but it's not gonna be soon.

It'll get a little bit better every day. That's something I've learned probably over the last, I would say, since 2020. And I don't know, that sounds like COVID. I would say 2022, probably more than anything, in closing that second location and learning that just about every situation is gonna get better.

Trev (27:41)

Well, one thing when you're saying that I was thinking about is like, probably took us the first three years of being in our mastermind group. because we're just, we were all so young that we're in our group at the time and we were so like, just focused on growth and getting bigger and like that kind of thing that we. Really didn't have deep as deep a conversations as we think we did. We had really good like business tactical conversations, but it took us a while.

Joe Rouse (27:52)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (28:04)

to grow, grow up really, cause we were early thirties, right? So we were like, we took us a while to grow up to realize that like our conversations got deeper over time and they became real conversations more than just business conversations. And I think that's when that that's when the magic of the group of the group of men really come in when it's no longer tactical. And I know like as a brotherhood group start to grow, I know early on they're going to be very tactical conversations and people, cause people come in thinking they're just doing business. It's going to take them six months, probably at least to be able to really start to

Joe Rouse (28:28)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (28:32)

I would say open up to a level that like we talk about, it's going to take them years of knowing each other to open up to a level that we think that we've seen as like how impactful and life changing this has been because we know each other so well, but it takes a while for people to really truly become transparent. We're even talking before this call that like even people we've known for a long time, there's certain areas where they're transparent went after the fact, but during the time they're going through it, we're not as transparent during the time we're going through things. And so it just takes time to to open those things up. And that just,

happens as you start to build those relationships. So that's why you need to get in groups and build those relationships early because it's going to take you a while before you become past the tactical side of things and become like truly transparent with each other, where you can be honest about what's happening in the moment. Yep. And it's when, it's when you, when you start to realize I don't need to take tactical things from this to have it be a valuable meeting. And that's where I think forever.

Joe Rouse (29:15)

Yeah, if you're with the right group long enough, the value only increases over time.

as you mature and go through life together.

Trev (29:31)

there have been people in our groups over the years that you could, you know, that once they stopped getting the business advice they wanted, they bailed, they just jumped ship because they weren't there for the same reasons everybody else was. And that's okay for them, but that just tells them that they weren't in the right room or they got the, a sense for them, they maximize the room to the maximum of their capacity. But tactical is just one part of the equation that you need in groups. And so it does take, you know,

Over time, takes people to realize what they're why they're in the right room. And once you start to have real conversations, people that aren't willing to willing to have real conversations, they pop out of the room. Yeah. All right, guys, we can go ahead and wrap up this podcast for the day. So we started off the conversation talking about anxiety and how we all struggle with it. And it's something that you're never going to get away from. and for me and Joe, one of our best tips, and I've even thought about this in the brotherhood at the end of our meetings, like having a specific prayer for people that are

Joe Rouse (30:05)

Yep, yeah, that's not the people we're looking for.

Trev (30:24)

what they're going through because it's like, we want to put these burden. We want to let these burdens go to God. Right. And so for me and Joe being able to do this, in our everyday life is something that's helped us to go forward. So if you're a strong Christian and you're somebody that really wants to get deeper into your prayer, pray to God about the things you're going through. Give him the burdens because he's willing to take them. He's there for you every single day. And so, and just know that as an entrepreneur, you're never going to get away from the burdens. Like that's what you signed up for. That's part of what we signed up for is not an easy life. We signed up for the harder life, but the harder life gives us a challenge every single day. And

Joe Rouse (30:49)

Mm-hmm.

Trev (30:54)

life being challenged. don't want life to be too challenging where it's like, it's hard to wake up in the day, but the everyday challenge that we have entrepreneurship, that's the fun and it's the game for us. It's the competition that we didn't, we don't have anymore now that we're not in sports. So, so just know that every there's everybody deals with anxiety. You're going to go through it every single day, find ways to relieve the anxiety and just know that there are groups of men out there like us, the brotherhood that are there to be able to support each other. And it might not be in the moment. It might not be in the moment that you're to be able to that exact relief, but being able to bounce that idea off somebody.

Joe Rouse (31:19)

you

Trev (31:23)

just makes life a lot easier.